Random Thought Tuesday

Ya'll ready for this?!

Ew. This does not look like the pretty pictures I see online

1. Can someone please provide me with a healthy "green" smoothie recipe? Every time I make one, it looks like someone threw up in my cup. I'm convinced all the pictures of green smoothies online are doctored to be a gorgeous green color.

2. I recently discovered this phenomenon called oil pulling. Basically, you swish coconut oil in your mouth for 15 minutes each day and it's supposed to clear out all these toxins in your body. I was 100% convinced this was going to be life changing. Day 1: I felt nauseous, but assumed it was the toxins leaving my body. Day 2: I threw up (too much throw up in one post?). I have officially given up on oil pulling.

3. On a similar note, someone needs to invent gluten free saltines.

4. We took Piper for a 3 mile walk last week. And by walk I mean I carried her for at least half of it because she laid down and refused to get up again. I'm not sure if I'm more embarrassed by that or the fact that I put her in an Easter dress on Sunday.

5. Are you all familiar with sock buns? You essentially put a sock in your hair and roll your hair over it and it makes this beautiful bun. I became obsessed with this last week (poor Justin). I used this Christmas sock with green stripes (you have to cut a hole in a sock). It totally worked, but you can see the green stripes through my beautiful sock bun. Only AFTER I had cut a hole in my sock did Justin tell me you can purchase hair-colored donuts specifically to make sock buns. Sigh.

6. We have approximately 2 weeks left of law school and my motivation is at an all time low. I was in Criminal Procedure the other day and we were discussing "attenuation of taint" (Google it if you really want to know what that is) and I started to giggle like a 5 year old. Again, I'm embarrassed for myself.

I will explain why this is relevant to #7 soon

7. My backup plan if this whole law school thing doesn't work out is to open a food truck with my youngest brother (Cal). It would be a gluten free food truck with a smoker. And we would try to sell alcohol, though Justin says this isn't possible. This idea is clearly becoming more appealing as I Googled prime food truck locations in D.C. last week.

8. I am 99% certain that I will cry hysterically in front of our mover because I get emotional about change. I am 100% certain that Justin partly chose our mover because this guy appeared to be capable of handling an emotional woman. Keep in mind, he toured the house during my oil pulling experience, so Justin likely chose well.

9. We FINALLY finished House of Cards Season 2 (I know, we're like a million weeks behind) and OMG. I fully intend to stalk Kevin Spacey in D.C. when I need a break from studying for the bar this summer. Although, did you know that because Netflix owns the rights to Frank Underwood, you can't take pictures of him or with him when he's "dressed in character"? How do I know if he's Frank Underwood or Kevin Spacey wearing a suit?! Life problem.

One of my precious children

10. I'm never having children. I've felt this way for awhile, but it was reemphasized at 11:30 p.m. yesterday in the ER vet with our cat who had a bad (read: violent) reaction to a sedative we gave him to take him to the vet for an exam. And again at 6:30 a.m. when we went to pick him up and pay the bill. He's fine, by the way. He's currently rolling around upstairs high on whatever sedative they gave him at the ER last night.

11. We've gotten to a level of chaos and stress that Justin can see when the crazy comes into in my eyes and will just go get me a glass of wine. This is an excellent trait in a husband.